Just Let Toddlers Vote

In the wake of the recent school shooting in Florida, a particular group of survivors have been received as youth activists in support of much harsher gun regulation.  The media, predictably, have been fawning over their actions, giving them the national platform attainable only, apparently, by striding over the corpses of their classmates to speak on a matter that, by their own admission, they know very little about.  Suggestions for the gun regulation fall into the same tired categories we’ve heard before—make the age restrictions higher, limit certain kinds of ammunition, blanket bans, etcetera—only this time, they’re coming from the mouths of babes. Continue reading “Just Let Toddlers Vote”

Into Old Americana

Cruise down long stretches of US Route 301 through Maryland and Virginia, interrupted by the periodic lurch of stop-light riddled commercial plazas and the crumbling, somewhat terrifying span over the Potomac known as the Governor Nice Bridge, and you’ll gain an appreciation for the rural decay that has hollowed out so much of America in the past several decades.  You can take the same amount of time driving both interstate and old US highway routes through Pennsylvania, Ohio, and the Carolinas, and especially throughout the backwoods of Florida and see all of the same things: vine-snaked windows on crumbling houses, shops long-since boarded up with nothing having taken their places, and whole towns emptied of business, people, and any semblance of community save for a handful of old retirees too old to pack up and move on. Continue reading “Into Old Americana”

Meme Generation

I’ve been to Portsmouth. I’ve been to the Grand Canyon. I’ve been to Houston and Tucson and the copper mines out west and the caves beneath the Appalachians. I haven’t been to Fairbanks but I know how to get there. America? I don’t even know what that is. I know the Lakota. I’m 1/256th Cherokee. I was practically born riding a Condor. I can speak French. I can speak ancient Greek. I pronounce ‘veni, vidi, vici’ with Ws. I hate it when people pose for photographs. Continue reading “Meme Generation”


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